Sell a house discreetly in a separation or divorce

A sale without spectators

When a marriage or partnership ends, most people do not want neighbours, colleagues or their children’s school friends to find the house on the internet. A discreet sale prevents exactly that. There is no listing, no sign and no strangers who simply drop by.

Neutrality is just as important. We work for both owners equally: both receive the valuation, demand figures and offers at the same time and in the same form. This creates trust, even when there is otherwise little agreement.

What options are there for the shared house?

There are essentially four routes for the shared house. Which one fits depends on finances, children and the relationship between you.

A discreet sale is suitable if both want to sell, or if one partner wants to take over and a realistic market value is needed. The quiet market test shows which price the market will bear – often the basis on which both can agree.

What do both partners need to consider?

If the house belongs to both, both must support the sale of the whole house and sign the purchase contract (§ 747 sentence 2 German Civil Code, BGB). Each can sell their own co-ownership share alone (§ 747 sentence 1 BGB), but there are hardly any buyers for half a house.

Even if only one partner is registered in the land register (Grundbuch), the other’s consent may be required: if you live in the statutory matrimonial property regime of community of accrued gains (Zugewinngemeinschaft) in Germany, one spouse may not dispose of their assets as a whole without the other’s consent (§ 1365 BGB). This also applies to a single house if it makes up almost all of the assets – according to case law, around 85 to 90% – and the buyer knows this. It does not apply with separation of property (Gütertrennung) or a deviating marriage contract. The rule only applies to spouses and only until the divorce becomes final.

For the equalisation of accrued gains (Zugewinnausgleich), the value of the assets on a reference date is decisive. In a divorce, under § 1384 BGB this is the day on which the divorce petition is served. A later sale does not change this reference date.

Further points you should discuss with your lawyer:

• Loans: Who is liable after the sale or takeover? Is an early repayment penalty (Vorfälligkeitsentschädigung) payable?
• Speculation period (Spekulationsfrist): In Germany, a sale within ten years of the purchase is taxable under § 23 German Income Tax Act (EStG), unless the property was occupied by the owner exclusively, or in the year of sale and the two preceding years. Caution when one partner takes over: transferring a share to the other in return for compensation or a waiver of the equalisation of accrued gains also counts as a sale for tax purposes. And anyone who has moved out and leaves the house to their ex-partner no longer occupies it themselves for tax purposes (Federal Fiscal Court, BFH, judgment of 14.02.2023 – IX R 11/21). Have this checked by a tax adviser before any agreement.
• Real estate transfer tax (Grunderwerbsteuer): If one partner takes over the other’s share, this is exempt from real estate transfer tax between spouses and between former spouses as part of the division of assets after the divorce (§ 3 nos. 4 and 5 German Real Estate Transfer Tax Act, GrEStG). This exemption does not apply to unmarried couples; if one partner takes over the other’s share, real estate transfer tax is payable on that share. § 1365 BGB also only applies to spouses.
• Right of residence and children: Who stays in the house until the sale? When is the move?

No legal or tax advice. The notes on §§ 747, 1365, 1384 BGB, § 180 ZVG, § 23 EStG (including BFH IX R 11/21) and § 3 GrEStG reflect the general legal position in Germany as of 26.10.2026. For your case, please consult a family law lawyer and your tax adviser.

How does a discreet sale work in a separation?

1. Initial consultation: individually or together, whichever suits you. We explain the process and answer questions.
2. Neutral valuation: Both partners receive the same valuation at the same time.
3. Joint release: The anonymous profile and price range are only published if both agree.
4. Quiet market test: Demand shows whether the price range is realistic.
5. Offers: Every offer goes to both partners at the same time.
6. Notary: Both sign the purchase contract. The notary (Notar) arranges the repayment of the loans and the payout.

We coordinate viewings so as to cause as little strain as possible – for example if one partner still lives in the house or children live there. The guide The discreet property sale process describes the general process.

What does a sale in a separation cost?

The commission depends on the property. For a single-family house or an apartment with a consumer as buyer, §§ 656a–656d BGB apply. At diskret.immo, the buyer’s commission is stated in every anonymous profile. The initial consultation, valuation and quiet market test are free of charge and non-binding; a commission is only payable on a successful sale and is agreed in advance in the brokerage agreement (Maklerauftrag). The owners split the seller’s share between themselves.